Do you have this habit?

"HABIT” is an established custom. It is a pattern of behavior acquired through frequent repetition. It is an aesthetic equivalent of that which is known in physics as "entropy"; the basic category in aesthetics. "Aesthetic “means” experience able and habit is anesthesia: we do not perceive what we are accustomed to. Accordingly, habit as the basic category of aesthetics is a measure of experience, of perception, and of being perceived: the more unusual, the more perceptible (shocking), and the older, the less experience able.

All of us would have acquired intangible number of habits with or without our knowledge. Few good, few bad. As Agatha Christie says "Curious things, habits. People themselves never know they have them. " we hardly realize we have one. Good one's you need not bother about, but it's the bad one's we need to discover and not just fix but eradicate. It's not always easy to realize you have one on your own, but if you pay enough attention on what poeple say and react you can find many, if not all.

Coming to which habit of mine am i speaking of in this blog ? Recently i was having a conversation with a very close friend of mine who passed across a compliment. My instant reaction for the same was denial and self critisicm. Complimenting me again he stated i need to work on how to receive a compliment rather than denying it everytime i received. The line surely did ring a bell in my head but i carried on conversing with him as if it went unnoticed.

" Please, i don't think so; What are you upto; What do you need; It's not just me; No big deal; ... " How many of us react with such lines when complimented rather than saying a simple " Thank you!!".

I sat and started recollecting the recent instances when i had got a compliment and how i had received and shockingly figured out i had denied every other compliment given and reacted in almost similar manner. I tried to then recollect any instances where i had graciously accepted and was unbeleiveable that i could hardly find few.

Compliment is an admiring remark; an expression of esteem, respect, affection, or admiration shown to a person by another. Accepting the same would help you boost your self-confidence. But still many of us lack to accept it due to our habitual behavior. This habitual behaiour of ours may be due to various reasons: lack of self-confidence, fear of being hurt, doubt whether it is genuine or not, being too modest not to accept one and so on. These habits may have developed since childhood for various reasons: incidents which made you not to beleive over and again, been hurt in couple of instances, not sure about your own capabilities from chilhood and so on. Thought here is not to find why or how we got into this habit but is to realize why do we need to eradicate it.

The best way way i thought i could figure out was to sit and think how would i really think a person would receive one when i give a genuine compliment or rather say putting myself in other person's shoes. And thinking so i had my answer. To receive it with a simple "Thank you". There may be much better way you could think of but in all cases "Thank you!!" would do the magic. Oops!! made me realize how worng or rude or ignorant or whatever it may be termed, i was in my reaction when i received one all these days.

As Joseph Kaines says "Habit is overcome by habit." i thought i would deliberatley put in effort to accept a compliment whenever i receive one and cheer myself up rather than denying and annoying the person who complimented. Genuine or not i feel i need not bother about and fear of getting hurt later should not haunt me as every feeling is controlled or compelled by our own thought process. Why not accept when i come across one and cheer up :). I compliment myself lot many times but in course of time had forgot to cheer myself when the same compliment was been passed across by others, be it family, friends, collegues or a total stranger. Thanks to my frined who made me realize how many a times i had kept myself away from being happy.

Wrapping it up i would like to say "Compliment is a kind of gift given not so generously by people. We need to be generous enough to receive one graciously and whenever we have a chance should not forget to give one whole heartedly. Oila!! Does'nt mean should not give one whenever we feel like."